Have you ever found yourself being inconsistent in your reply to a client, colleague or friend i.e. you responded differently to one persons request than another, depending on whether the request was expressed in a polite manner or whether it was expressed in a direct manner, whether you know the person for a long time or you know them only for a little while?
You might have found yourself prioritising one request and taking more time with another or found yourself being less strict with your policies when it’s a person that in some ways is “different” and therefore “should” get a “different” response to your standard response?
Have you seen the new movie with Colin Firth “The Kings Speech”, where Colin Firth plays King George VI with a speech problem and he seeks help from a speech therapist? When he comes to the speech therapist, he expects the speech therapist to call him “Your Royal Highness” and the speech therapist says “Bertie” to him, treating him just like any of his other patients?
My year has kicked off with a major key learning which is to be consistent in the way I treat all my clients, colleagues and friends, regardless of my personal preferences and labels. It’s only natural as human beings that we have a tendency to put labels on people i.e. like one person better than the other because they fit our own internal world as to what’s okay in terms of behaviour and how people show up and what’s not okay for us, based on our experiences from the past. So when I am out shoe shopping (which happens sometimes… maybe often considering my huge shoe collection), I might like one pair of shoes better than the other, however at the end, a shoe is a shoe and so is a request from a client, colleague or friend, simply just a request!
So I’ve noticed that I have an ego (mind), that is ready to get upset any minute if I don’t like the way people show up, or the way requests come in, if they are not all written in a lovey dovey way 😉 or I don’t like when people don’t follow certain rules and then I get upset.
I have learned that I can’t influence how people or certain situations show up, however I can choose to be consistent in the way I respond to those situations. Having made an effort to be consistent over the past weeks, I have noticed how much up energy this has given me with my clients, friends and colleagues.when I choose to be consistent. I respect them for who they are and how they show up and be true to myself in my dealings with them.
The Beatles wisely said, ‘Let it be, let it be ohhh let it be, let it be…..(they obviously had that key learning years back already).
In a nutshell I’ve learned if I just accept a situation for what it is without adding positive or negative energy to it (i.e. getting upset), then the situation resolves itself and loses it’s power over me!
So rather than getting upset if a situation doesn’t show up the way I prefer, I choose to respond to the situation in a consistent manner knowing that this is really all I can influence and the rest, I need to just let “be”.